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Thursday 21 September 2017

Kosmemophobia - My daily struggle..


Here in my second post, I think I would like to explain in a little more detail just how this Kesmemophobia affects me on a daily basis and has done for as long as I can remember, and hope this will show you where i'm coming from, and how this effects my life from day to day. And I guess to how my mind works when it comes to this irrationality.

Now, I have never spoke to anyone about how this effects me, people just think that i'm just not into Jewellery, or that i'm just not keen on wearing it. I guess the only person who knows how I feel, though not to the irrational degree that I do is my wife, and part of the initial attraction to her over 20 years ago was the fact that she didn't wear jewellery, but with her being a very practical person, for her its because it gets in the way rather than feel the same as I do. And as far as she is concerned, that's what I led her to believe, that its just an annoyance as well as the fact she knows I think its dirty and unnecessary.

Prior to writing this post today, I thought I would just nip around the house and take a few pictures to show you the sort of things that I have a problem with, and try to give a reason why.. And remember, its not just jewellery on a person and me coming into contact with that person that i dont like, it can be what that person touches, as in my head the ring, braclet or whatever leaves a residue which I don't like to touch. But we shall get into that a little later... Also, things like keys and cutlery I have issues with. (Blimey, the more and more I write this down, the more im sounding like i'm completely mental!)

So within a 2 minute window walking around the house, I found these particular, offending items..

First, there's this... Now unfortunately I am currently separated from my wife and share a house with someone who's father was a vicar and she has it on the wall.  To me this is doubly a concern, because not only is this an intricate form of jewellery, but anything to do with religion or the church really makes me feel uncomfortable and uneasy. Which again, has been an issue in my life, but will save that story for a later date....luckily this hideous item is in the spare room and I refuse to go in there. Though have had to sleep the night in that room once when we had guests. Needless to say I didn't sleep much that night!


My housemate has a friend staying with us at the moment, who has brought her jewellery box with her, now prior to me taking this picture, she had her jewellery spread out on the sideboard but thankfully have put it away, but as far as i'm concerned, once she has gone, I won't be able to touch the surface of the sideboard, because the jewellery had been in contact with it. Even if I was to bleach the surface once she has gone, all I will be able to think about was the fact it had contact with the necklaces or whatever the hell it was. Even now, as you can see there is a chain hanging out of a box, which makes me feel physically sick.

As you can see there are two spoons, one a solid spoon, the other, with a pattern on it. 
I love tea, two sugars, so need a spoon to make my tea and stir.  The spoon on the left I have no issue with (its my spoon, purposely purchased because of its plain design!), whereas the patterned one on the right, I can't even bring myself to pick up, let alone make a cup of tea with it. I actually took it out of the drawer using a piece of kitchen roll to touch it, and keep my spoon and cutlery in a separate place, as not to contaminate my spoon by them touching...(I'm nuts!) But in fairness to the teaspoon, i'm like it with all the cutlery in the drawer. Anything with a pattern on is big a no no. And before drinking any tea always check to see which spoon was used as if it's not one I approve of, I just can't drink it.



Next on list are other peoples keys.. the thought of touching or using someone else's keys fills me with dread. The set below is my housemates work keys, which last week she left at work and asked me to pick up for her. When she asked me my heart sunk, as I knew they, for some reason have a patterned spoon handle as a key ring. Again, a double whammy, but how could I tell her I didn't want to get them for her because touching them would have made me feel queasy. I had to bite the bullet and get them but as soon as I got them back, rushed to wash my hands in the bathroom.
Then there's this small, quite inoffensive date thing.. It's an heirloom from my housemate's childhood home. The fact that is small, old and made of some type of metal really creeps me out. And even more ridiculous if my housemate makes a cup of tea after changing the date on this I can't drink it, which has happened a few times. What a waste of good tea! And forget about me using those fancy spoons in the cup next to it!

Onto the bathroom, or anywhere there is a plug chain. Again, I find myself using something to protect my fingers from touching this thing.. I find the actual old fashioned chain ones even worse. Peolpe use to wear these types of ball bearing chains around their neck, so maybe thats where I get the yucky feeling from....

Finally, I started writing this blog entry in bed last night, but when I went to leave for work this morning my housemate keys were in the front door, like a barrier for me to leave. And to get out of the house I used a piece of tissue from the toilet to turn the key. 

Additionally, my housemate wears a silver ring, and have on numerous occasions when she has offerd to prepare and make something to eat, have to find myself making some excuse as not to eat as she always wear this ring.. 

So, in these few brief paragraphs I have tried to paint a picture of the hurdles, and thoughts I go through on a daily basis. And in all honesty, seeing these things written down in print, I sure do have a problem... 

Am I mental??

My next entry will be about my Kosmemophbia, and the workplace...

Thanks for reading.










Tuesday 19 September 2017

I have Kosmemophobia - My story...

Hello,

Currently whilst writing this, I am 43 years of age and although have never blogged before, feel now is the right time to start and perhaps tell my story.
The reason I feel compelled to do something like this now is unclear at this moment, but having spent my life living with this rather strange affliction I would like to share my previous experiences living with this odd, and what I now know is a phobia and try to blog on a regular basis obstacles I face from day to day..
So to all of you out there, which I guess is most of the general population Kosmemophobia is quite simply the fear of Jewellery.... Silly,perhaps. Ridiculous, yes. Life threatening, of course not. Though do believe me, this is very real, and quite awful to live with.

Up until 2 days ago, I had spent my life feeling that I was just being stupid and irrational, and that one day I may get over it. But as mentioned before i'm 43 now and I haven't and can't see it ever changing.

It was only because I was bored one night and after once again been accidentally touched by someones ring whilst giving them change at work and feeling horrid and dirty about it for hours afterwards decided to "Google" the term Fear of Jewellery, and saw that this was actually a real thing, and found a Facebook page and blogs where others were going through the same thing. Which in a twisted way made me feel better.

Thing is though, that unlike being scared of heights, snakes, spiders etc (the usual phobias) these common phobias are not things that people come across every day and can be avoided, whereas pretty much most people deem it necessary to wear some sort of jewellery, whether it be rings, necklaces, earrings, nose rings etc etc (its turning my stomach just writing these words down...) and have to face these horrid items on a daily basis. (In my case, it even stretches to other items, such as certain types of cutlery with patterns on the handles and even other peoples keys, amongst many other things..)

So in response to my own question to why i'm doing this, after writing these few paragraphs I guess its to reach out to others, not only those who have Kosmemophobia but others who feel they have some "weird", irrational fear and not feel stupid as I have for 43 years! and knowing after all these years there are others who feel this way about jewellery, I felt a sense of relief that i wasn't a weirdo, and hope for my blog to be somewhat cathartic...
I also would just like to put down in writing my more extreme experiences from the past, (some I guess maybe quite funny, others rather more sad...)

So, please feel free to follow me and my blog and if you feel you have Kosmemophobia or any other "strange", irrational phobia, be sure to contact me or leave a comment. I'd love to hear from you and your experiences.

Also check out this Facebook page I found related to the subject. https://www.facebook.com/jewerlyphobia/

https://cryptotabbrowser.com/13411695